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Broke and Bourgie Summer


Where have you been? What happened to your blog? Are you still writing?

Sigh.

These are all the questions I've gotten lately. I've been pretty good at evading the answers but I think I'm ready to share now. So here I go:

There I was, going along, living my "I'm a strong black woman, Ms. Independent, cause I wanna be bad and bourgie" life where that master's degree qualified career and matching salary bought me whatever I wanted.

I had my own apartment. I had my own car. I ordered take out every night. I had a laundry service care for my clothes. I went to brunch every Saturday and Sunday. I bought $300 weaves. I bought clothes and shoes every time I got paid. I paid for five-star vacations with cash.

My life was cute. Right up until reality hit and I realized it actually wasn't.

I was living my life, enjoying the benefits that my degrees afforded me. Except I forgot a couple of things: my degrees weren't cheap; I took out student loans to pay for them; and those loans weren't getting any smaller. Ever. They were only going to keep compounding interest and raising the minimum payment and demanding I pay $800/month on those loans.

Sigh.

And there I was, feeling the pinch of paying my student loans and trying to maintain the lifestyle I created for myself. It. wasn't. working. I figured something had to change. Either somebody needed to blow up the Navient building or I needed to pay my loans off. And since the former is a crime nobody's really trying to go down for, I guess I have to do the latter.

And here I am, completely changing my life, paying off these loans.

I gave up my apartment. I'm trading in my car for a Metrocard. I cook dinner at home with my family. I wash and fold my own clothes. I haven't been to brunch in months. I cut all my hair off. I haven't bought clothes in months. I cancelled my old blog because the web-hosting was costly. And I'm sitting my broke and bourgie tail down in my house this summer. All to pay off my loans.

I keep being reminded that, “The rich rule over the poor, and the borrower is slave to the lender,” (Proverbs 22:7) and since the ancestors fought so hard to get us out of slavery, and Jesus purchased our freedom on the cross, I'm not really trying to be bound by anyone, especially Sallie Mae and her spawn child Navient. I'm on a debt-free journey and that's where I'll be for now.

Lourdes Anita

 

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